Defining and Discovering Your Family ValuesMar 07, 2023
What are your family values? This is a question that is not often asked, but it is an important one. Family values are the guiding principles by which we live our lives. They provide us with a sense of direction and purpose. Without them, we would be lost. This blog post will discuss family values and how to discover them for yourself and your family.
Family values are important.
Values are highly desirable traits that serve as a guide on what we do and think about. They are something we learn and form over time. The various institutions we get immersed in and the people we interact with can affect how our values form. One of these institutions is the family, which plays a vital part in how one's values form.
Family values are not that different from the individual values we have. The main difference is that it now affects an entire group instead of a single person; in this case, all the members that make up the family, such as the father, mother, and children. Having a set of values that all family members follow is something that you may want to do, especially as a parent. In addition, having a good set of values everyone follows is a strong foundation that can eventually affect how we act and think outside the family. We may want to set these values, as they can be beneficial in several ways.
- Family values are a good starting point for children to know how to act and behave appropriately. Since the family is most likely the first institution a child will be immersed in, it will be good for them to experience an environment that fosters positive values and teaches good morals.
- Having good family core values creates a sense of unity and cooperation between family members. In addition, it gives the entire family something to strive for, guiding everyone's actions and decisions toward the family values set.
- When challenges and problems involve a family member or everyone, it is easier to deal with them by taking the appropriate action and making decisions that follow the moral values set by the family. As a result, conflict resolution becomes more manageable, and it is easier to agree on a solution when everyone knows what value to follow.
- When strong family values are present within a family, the family unit becomes an amazing influential group that can affect others in society. They leave a lasting legacy for younger children and future generations, and others may also emulate the value system they have. When everybody does good in a community, everyone will benefit.
Setting values for all family members
Identifying what values to have and setting them can be easy or not, depending on one's upbringing. The parents will put the family values, and they may implement the ones they have for their children. However, as children grow up, they may start to have personal core values that can differ from their parents. This can cause values to clash if the parents want to set something, but the children disagree. For family values to work, they must be something that everyone in the family adheres to. Establishing and defining your family values can be achieved by doing the following things.
- Recognize the benefits everybody can get when family values are set. Unless people find the use of setting family values, it is pointless to put them when everybody is just going their way following personal values instead of a collective one.
- Once people realize the benefits of setting family values, the next step should be identifying what values to set. Family values are not exclusive and can be the same personal values one has. The values a family sets can be based on what collective goal everybody wants to achieve, or they can be values passed down from what the parents believe in. Remember also that children can have an input on what family values to set, especially once they become older and have more realizations on life.
- Set a family meeting where everyone in the family can talk with each other about what values to set. Then, let everybody have a turn to speak and identify each others' goals, strengths, and weaknesses. Finally, look for a compromise and a point where everyone agrees. For example, a family may want to set family values because they want to achieve a goal that requires the participation of everyone, and all will benefit from it. However, some may not realize the benefit of the universal family goal, and that's why everyone must come to an agreement and realize the worth of working together following family values.
- Once values are identified and set after a family discussion, the family values can be noted down verbally and in written form that will serve as a mission statement for everyone to follow. It's like having a business meeting where all participants must agree to reach closure and move toward a single goal. The family goal can be anything; it can be buying a house for the benefit of everyone, where everybody must pitch some work and their earnings to contribute. Another example can be promoting a healthy lifestyle for all family members so that everyone will live a long and healthy life and can enjoy the company of each other better.
- After an agreement has been set, everyone must commit and ensure everyone does what has been agreed upon to achieve the family goal and consistently maintain and practice family values. Then, if somebody goes astray, there can be an agreement on what should be done for correction. Also, family members may change priorities and beliefs over time, so the family should be flexible enough to handle such situations and adjust what values they want to believe in and follow.
Collective values are beneficial.
Having a family value is something other families may not have any time to consider, but it is worth pondering. Then, when you have a challenging time setting personal values, you can use your family values as your own and have them work as your guiding principle. Family life can become better when there are values present that tie the members together, and family relationships can become more robust. In addition, when the whole family acts as a morally upstanding unit, it can spill over to the community and society to which they belong, creating responsible behavior and actions. Having clear family values can be a worthy goal to strive for. You may approach and talk with your family members if you want to work on something as a group and want everybody to grow and achieve something nice.