Stop Creating Problems for YourselfJan 11, 2023
We all have problems in our lives. But many of these problems are things that we create in our minds. Yet, we can do something about it. This blog post will discuss ways to stop making problems for yourself and start living a happier life.
We are the ones who create problems.
Life is full of problems, or is it? Some of us will like to think that life is difficult, and part of the reason is that life likes to throw problems at us. However, the truth is that we are the ones who create problems. Sure enough, some people's actions affect the lives of others and make it more troublesome for them, but many of our problems are creations of our minds. Problems are only situations; it's we who put value in them. How we see things, whether good or bad, create meaning. Situations are just that: they happen, and that's it. However, once we experience situations and apply our perspectives based on our values and interests, they turn into something else. Seeing a situation negatively and as something unpleasant that goes against what we want turns a situation into a problem. Also, our actions can serve as triggers that create problems when they shouldn't happen in the first place. Therefore, knowing that several of our actions and thoughts cause problems is essential. By becoming aware of these things, we can do something to lessen our burdens and think that life is not so bad after all.
1. Making unwise decisions
Many of our problems get created when we make bad decisions. But, unfortunately, making choices is part of life, and if we don't think carefully about our decisions, especially the consequences, should things fail, we are setting ourselves up for trouble. Making rash decisions or deciding while angry or not in a proper mood can lead to ineffective decisions that will only bite us later. Also, some of us may still want to push through with a decision despite it having a high chance of failure and creating adverse effects on us. Once bad things happen, we only have ourselves to blame if we don't think carefully about our choices. So we should always make it a point to think carefully about the pros and cons of a decision before we decide to push through. And if we need to take a risk, make sure that it is a calculated risk, meaning that you are prepared to handle the consequences should things fail, and you have a backup plan in case things go wrong.
2. Endless worrying about the past or future
A significant portion of our problems is when we think of scenarios that may or may not happen if we choose to worry about the future or bring up a past issue. What happened in the past has already concluded; we can't do anything more to change them. On the other hand, the future is yet to happen, and many possibilities can happen. We are only creating anxiety and tiring ourselves if we focus on things that we cannot change or uncertain events. It's okay to think something about the future or the past sometimes, but it's better to spend our energy on the present moment because it is where we can make the changes that can prevent whatever we fear or improve on a past mistake. The present is where we spend most of our time, so don't waste too much time thinking about how you will be in an imaginary period in the future or how you could change things by going back to the past.
3. Lack of skill and knowledge about something
Any given situation is more likely to become a problem for us if we don't know how to deal with it. We may not have the resources, such as enough money or the skill, so we may start feeling weak and helpless in the face of something. So one workaround we can do is to be more prepared by learning about various things, especially skills and knowledge that can come in handy for something you foresee will happen to you. For example, situations will occur when we need extra cash, such as equipment suddenly breaking down, getting into an accident, or acquiring an illness. The truth is that these things can indeed happen, so we can create a buffer by having extra savings that will help us through these things should they occur. Things will look less of a problem if we know we can overcome them, and making preparations beforehand can help us. Understanding and acquiring skills about various things can help us should something arise that requires expertise from what we can learn.
4. How we perceive and react to things
Problems become problems if we choose to think of them as one. Therefore, if we can reorient our minds and think of them as something else, they will not become problems anymore. For example, having a positive and growth mindset can make you think of what are supposed to be problems as challenges and learning experiences. Our perspectives can turn the worst thing into something not terrifying, depending on how we look at situations that happen. Also, we don't always have to react whenever something occurs, especially if it is not relevant to our interests and beliefs. We can always train our minds to change how we look and react to what is happening around us, and we may realize that not everything should be treated as a problem.
5. Making comparisons
Most people like to compare themselves with each other regarding their achievements, possessions, and whatever possible thing you can think of. Comparing ourselves with others can be a good source of motivation and inspiration to become better and see if we can achieve the same things or be better as others. However, too many comparisons can lead to creating problems for ourselves. Suddenly, we may feel lacking or inadequate regarding what we have and what we are currently doing with our lives. You may feel the need to acquire and do something, even though it's not in your interests, but because you saw others do it, you may feel the urge to do it. And if you cannot replicate what your friends and neighbors do, you may suddenly think you have a problem when you aren't supposed to have one. Therefore, regulating the comparison of your life with others can help lessen your worries and problematic situations by focusing on what you have, which may already be sufficient to make you happy and fulfilled.
It's all in our heads.
Whether something becomes a problem or not depends on us. When your mind starts thinking of something as problematic, it will become an issue for you. However, look the other way around, and something may not be an issue. Keeping our minds calm whenever something occurs and trying to look at how it factors into the big picture can help us see whether what we are dealing with at the moment is something that can trouble us. Usually, it's when something is beyond our power and goes against our expectations and interests that it becomes an issue. But even if something is against our interests and expectations, we can still ignore the thought that it is a problem and think of it as something else. Realizing how we perceive things is the first step that can help us control how we look at situations, and we may recognize that our lives may not be as problematic as it seems. Doing preemptive actions and preparations can also make us more ready if things happen, so we can worry less and improve things.