When to Give Up

commitment give up persistence Jan 24, 2022

There comes a time in life when we must decide whether to keep going or give up. It is often difficult to determine, but sometimes, giving up is better. If you have been struggling with something in your life, be it your goals, relationship, work, or business, for a while and you don't see any signs of improvement, it might be time to call it quits. This blog post will discuss when to give up on something and move on to something new and better.

Only you can decide when to give up.

In life, it's more common to hear other people say that you shouldn't give up when faced with something that is giving us a difficult time. But, most of the time, it's true that you shouldn't give up so quickly after experiencing failures when pursuing something. Perseverance is the key to success. Only when we have tried enough and exhausted our skills and resources will we reach triumph and fulfill our goals. However, persevering sometimes will do the opposite and make us suffer if we keep doing something that doesn't benefit us anymore.

Quitting might seem like a cowardly act to people, but sometimes, it is a better choice than continuing fighting for something that only affects our mental health. Some situations include:

  • Staying on a job that's only making you feel miserable because the work doesn't interest you, and maybe you have an unpleasant boss or coworkers, and you're only sticking because of the money.
  • Sticking to a romantic relationship where only one party is interested in the other, and hostilities are already happening. There's a lack of love and connection between the two of you.
  • Pursuing a goal, but you are not happy with the process anymore. The only reason you are continuing is that you already exerted a lot of effort and used up resources to hope that something great will happen at the end, which is not guaranteed.
  • Continuing to do something only because you are afraid others will criticize you for dropping something.

It's essential to realize the signs that it's better to give up on something. The challenge here is that you must be aware of your current situation and decide whether to continue or not. Your friends and peers might be able to pinpoint the reality for you, but they might not have a full grasp of what's going on inside your head. Therefore, it's critical to recognize the signs of quitting when it puts you in a better position in your life.

1. You are not happy with the process anymore

Goals and dreams are incredible, and they give us a direction to follow in life. We usually associate some form of happiness that we can attain after fulfilling our dreams. However, these things can take time to accomplish, and if you are only betting on your joy in the future, there is a chance that you might get burned out while working on many things to achieve what you want. It can take years before you hit your goal, and there's even a chance you might end up not hitting your target. Therefore, it's vital that you are happy with what you are doing to fulfill your dream. If every waking day feels like a slog to get through while working on your goal and you feel miserable, maybe it's not worth it for you anymore. It might be a good idea to follow a different path instead.

2. Deep inside, you know it won't work out

Sometimes, you have to trust your gut feeling that pursuing something will never come to fruition. One example is working on projects beyond your capabilities but being told to work on them anyway because they are supposed to give great rewards. Or how about staying in a relationship where the other party expects you to fit according to expectations, but you don't act and think in the way he wants? You have to weigh in your mind whether it will still make sense to continue for the sake of it when you keep on experiencing failure even after exhausting all options available. When your heart and mind also start to knock on you that it feels futile to continue, it's a sign to let go and start moving forward towards something else.

3. You have let your goals and ambitions identify you

As we go on through our lives in this world, we spend many years doing our jobs and pursuing various goals throughout our careers. Sometimes, we let our work and objectives serve as those that identify who we are in society. However, the truth is that we are something else outside of the work career that we have or the dream that we are trying to achieve. So if you want to quit on something that you have been doing for so long to the point that you attribute it as your defining characteristic, it can be tough to do so. When the only reason you have for not stopping is a long-term association with something that identifies you, and you're not getting anything positive anymore, it's time to put your energy elsewhere. You have to realize that your work and goals are not the only things that identify you as a person.

4. You think you will feel relieved when you give up

While going through a rough patch to achieve what you desire, try thinking for a moment about the gains you will get if you decide to continue or drop what you are doing. Let's use the example of sticking to a well-paying job with good benefits but with the added perks of hostile coworkers, an abusive boss, difficulties in career advancement due to office politics, and a commute to work full of hassle and traffic. At the same time, you have an online business as a side gig, but it doesn't pay well as your primary job. You might have a tough time deciding to quit your job because it pays well, but deep inside, you have this sense of relief you know you will get once you leave the hostile workplace of your job. If you feel more relief from quitting rather than continuing on something that only makes you miserable, it's a sign that giving up will be the better option. Besides, if you know that there will be better and new opportunities awaiting you after quitting and have backup options, it won't be a total loss for you to leave.

5. Your life feels miserable

When you feel miserable every day trying to succeed on your goal, it's not only you that's affected. You might be neglecting other parts of your life. For example, in pursuing your dream, you might be failing to spend time with your family. You might also forget to take a break and have some rest and recreation. In addition, you might neglect to communicate with your friends or take care of other priorities. A worthwhile goal doesn't have to eat all your time and take away other opportunities. If you find yourself in a situation like this, you should know when to give up, and it will be in your best interest to do other projects or goals that won't sacrifice your core values and quality time with other things in life, like the people that matter the most to you.

Giving up can be another way of moving forward.

When you have spent years working and building up to something, it can be challenging to throw away the towel, and for a good reason. You have spent a lot of time and resources working on something to the point that you identify yourself with your goal, and giving it up is like throwing away a part of yourself. However, it can be futile to continue to seek something if all you are getting are pain and misery from having to do something every day.

Giving up can be wrong and an act of cowardice for other people. However, your stubbornness may eventually take a toll on your mental health, and any positive outcome you get might not be enough to compensate for the losses you will gain on your quest to fulfill your goals. Therefore, it's essential to know yourself well to figure out which answer is better: give up or continue to fight. Sometimes, the better solution is to give up. However, giving up doesn't essentially mean you're going to stop. Instead, you might just be giving yourself a second chance to try taking a different path that can provide you with fulfillment and happiness.

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