Letting Go of People in Your LifeMay 09, 2022
It can be challenging to let go of people in our lives, especially if they have been a part of it for a long time. However, there comes a time when we must realize that some relationships are toxic and holding us back from reaching our full potential. This blog post will discuss the signs that it's time to let go of someone in your life and how to do it healthily.
Why should you let go of people?
Letting go of people in one's life might sound like a cruel act, but it's something that we must sometimes do. Being in a toxic relationship with someone prevents us from moving forward and achieving our full potential. Toxicity in a relationship can show in several ways. First, it can be difficult to acknowledge them if we refuse to accept that somebody in our lives is doing more harm than good in a relationship. Signs of toxicity can include:
- Being with somebody in your life gives you more stress and headaches than good feelings and happiness.
- The relationship is getting one-sided; one person keeps on taking from the other, while the giver doesn't realize that they are getting manipulated for the benefit of the taker.
- You don't feel like your good deeds, and acts get returned for their worth. Instead, you might get scolded with hurtful words.
- Conflicts happen more often between you and the person concerned.
- Toxic people like to play the victim. They will often think they haven't done anything wrong, and you will always be the antagonist in their lives.
- Even if you forgive such complex people, they will still keep doing their destructive behaviors and actions against you.
- They will often make you feel worthless and point out your faults and weaknesses to destroy your self-esteem.
The moment you see such signs with someone you have a significant relationship with, be it a family member, friend, or a loved one, it might be time to let go of such complicated relationships. However, letting go of someone can be very challenging, especially if someone has been with you for a long time. Also, your relationship with someone might have been good initially, but as time passes, it may have worsened, and the other person changed the way they treat you. It could be because their expectations are not met, or their view of things shifted from what they were once before.
If you find yourself at the receiving end of a complicated relationship, think twice before letting go of someone in your life. A single instance of conflict is not enough to warrant a dismissal of the other person in your life. However, if you feel like you have been tormented for some time already, it might be time to let go of the other person. For example, suppose you feel anxious whenever you see or are reminded of the concerned person, or there are more anger and negative feelings in your mind than positive ones. In that case, these are signs that the relationship may no longer be beneficial to you. Letting go of someone doesn't mean you erase a person's existence in your life. Instead, it means you let the both of you pursue your paths that will bring greater happiness and fulfillment rather than getting stuck in a relationship that doesn't work. To let go means to move forward, and there are ways how one can let go of someone properly in their life.
1. Acknowledge the fact that you need to let go
Accepting the reality that something is already wrong with your relationship with someone and seeing the signs mentioned above is the first step toward letting go. However, if you keep getting delusional that nothing is wrong and continue to hold on no matter how much pain and grief somebody is giving you, it will be challenging to let go from such a state. Acknowledging that a relationship is doing more harm than good is vital. Once the truth sets in your mind, it is from here that you can gather up the courage and finally say "It's time" to let go and move forward in your life.
2. Keep away from anything that will remind you of the person concerned
Letting go is tough, and you can do yourself a favor and try to limit your exposure to anything that may remind you of the person you are letting go of in your life. For example, keeping your distance and looking away at objects, such as pictures of the person involved, can work, and staying away from social media as you might see posts and images of the person you are letting go in your life. Reminding yourself of the hurtful past can only make it difficult to move forward.
3. Forgive and show some empathy
Even if you have let go of somebody in your life, learn to forgive the person. The hurtful things done to you may be unforgettable, but forgiving puts these things in the past and allows you to focus more on your future. Show some empathy and wish that the person you let go finds happiness in life. Don't forget that you were once friends or family with the person you let go of, and good things also happened in the past. So let go, but don't do it to erase somebody's existence in your life.
4. Prioritize yourself and do something else
Undergoing the process of letting go can be stressful, so it's essential to take care of yourself. Neglecting yourself will only make you feel worse, so self-care should be a priority. Get busy and do something that will help you get over the memories of the person you once had a good friendship or relationship with within your life. Take time to do some goal-setting and pursue what you couldn't before due to being held back by a strained relationship. Focus more on your hobbies and passions.
5. Talk to somebody
Whenever something stressful happens in our lives, one of the best ways to handle the emotional pressure is by talking to somebody about our situation, preferably somebody willing to lend an ear and maybe give sound advice. A trusted friend or family member will do, and you can even consult with them for a second opinion before you decide to let go of someone. However, when things are taking a toll on your psychological well-being, it won't hurt to seek professional help from a therapist. The goal of speaking to somebody is to vent out your frustrations and get some support on what you should do moving forward.
6. Don't think you won't find something better
To let go of someone can give anybody a hard time if there are limiting beliefs preventing you from taking action. Most people can't let go of someone because they are afraid that they may not find somebody again who can provide the same amount of friendship, love, or care as the person they are trying to let go of in their lives. You wouldn't know unless you go out there in the world and put yourself forward. You have to love yourself, reinforce your mind with positive thoughts, and control your emotions. Letting go will be more manageable once limiting beliefs are out of the way.
Everybody deserves a healthy relationship.
Our relationships with people should ideally be well and good. However, we may have connections that bring more emotional pain than the support and love we should be getting. People have differing views and beliefs, and clashes of opinions may occur. What was once a healthy relationship may turn sour as people change their opinions on things, including how they see us as part of their lives. Some people can even be downright nasty and only have a relationship with others to serve their needs without any concern for the other person. When relationships no longer serve their purpose, it's better to let go and move forward.
Letting go of someone should be done correctly where both parties agree to go separate ways. When only one side wants to let go, the other party may cling on and cause further issues. The process should be done when both parties are calm and not full of anger, and this is to ensure that both parties will be able to make rational decisions. As much as possible, letting go of people should only be a last resort when all else fails. If, after multiple reconciliations, conflicts still don't disappear and one person continues to commit atrocities toward the other, this is a time when letting go of the person in your life should be done. Again, setting boundaries can help until you are ready to break free. Everybody deserves to love and care. These things cannot be given solely by one person to us, and anybody who shows genuine love and support for us can easily share them.