It's Okay to Say You Are Not Okay

emotions Nov 03, 2022

We all have those days when we feel like everything is going wrong. Maybe we fought with our significant other or just got bad news. Whatever the reason, it's okay to say that you are not okay. It's more than okay. It's necessary. Telling others that you are not okay shows them that you trust them and are willing to be vulnerable in front of them. It also allows them to support you during tough times. They will never know if you don't tell anyone how you feel. So the next time something makes you upset, go ahead and tell someone, "I'm not okay."

Be honest with what you are feeling.

In our daily lives, we may not feel okay all the time. For example, there are times when our emotional state is in the dumps due to problems and various issues. And while you are feeling sad, others may ask, "How are you doing?" When faced with an inquiry from others asking about your condition, most people may be inclined to answer that, yes, "I am fine" or "I am good and okay." However, the truth is that you are not feeling okay, but since you feel ashamed or don't want to make yourself look vulnerable, you tell others you are okay even if it is not.

There is a problem when we become dishonest about our emotional state. We can become conflicted with our feelings by pretending to be in good condition when we are not. Since you told others that you are fine, people will now expect you to act okay, and you may feel pressured to keep up the facade. It's like trying to act like somebody you are not.

You have to realize that it's okay not to be okay and tell that to others. Then, there is less pressure, and you don't need to keep up an act to hide negative emotions like sadness or anger. Also, by telling how you are feeling honestly, people will be more willing to help you now that they know you are not feeling okay. By being honest with your condition and feelings, you also get the chance to face whatever makes you feel down and act on them to solve the problem.

Before telling others, you are not okay, it's essential to consider several things that will make it easier, to be honest with your condition and feelings.

1. Who is the person asking you

Anybody can ask you whether you are okay, even random strangers. For example, they may inquire about your condition when they see you not looking okay or feeling down. So you have to think next if you are okay telling your situation and feelings to this person. What may happen is that once you tell others you are not okay, they may further inquire about your condition. So are you alright with disclosing further information about yourself to others? How much you trust or how close a person is to you can dictate whether you can easily say you are not okay. If you feel comfortable telling somebody your situation and think they are trustworthy, then it's fine to speak to them about yourself.

2. Is the person asking somebody that can help you?

One reason you may want to open up to others about what you are feeling is that they may be able to assist you in your situation. For example, it's easier to be honest with your case to a therapist because they are trained to listen to others' worries and can provide advice on how to deal with your problem. The same thing can happen to trusted friends and family members who can lend an ear to listen to you and provide support in whatever way they can help you. So when you open up, you invite others who can help you, and they may improve your situation.

3. How will you feel when you tell others you are not okay

Depending on how we may feel after telling others we are not okay, we may or may not do it. Sometimes, we feel like we are not ready yet to talk to others about our situation, maybe because we don't feel like letting others intervene or are unprepared to face our problems. However, we must feel comfortable telling others we are not okay; otherwise, it's better to keep things to ourselves first if we are not yet ready to disclose our feelings. Also, if we feel that our burdens will lighten if somebody hears us out and possibly help us too, then it's time to tell others we are not okay.

We can't always feel okay, and it's okay to tell others about it.

It's okay to tell others you are not okay; however, we cannot openly tell everyone about our feelings and situation. Therefore, it would help if you also considered what benefit you would gain from telling others about your problem. For example, some people ask about your condition to open up a conversation, while others may use it to get to know you better or obtain some information they want. That's why picking the people you will tell you are not okay is essential. Ideally, it should be those that can listen and help you in your situation. Also, you must be ready to open up when you tell others about your case, as not being prepared will make you feel negative emotions once you recall and tell others what's bothering you. Admitting that we are having a difficult time is better for our mental health. In addition, it can lessen our suffering by acknowledging that there is a problem and that others may have the resources and ability to help us with whatever is giving us a hard time.

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